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A Stable Home may Require Post-Divorce Nesting

On behalf of Gregory W. Stevens, Attorney at Law on Tuesday, March 3, 2020.

If you're interested in giving your children a stable home life after divorce, you have a few different options. You need to do what is right for your family. One thing to consider, which perhaps provides the most stability, is known as nesting.

How do You do it?

Nesting is a simple process, at least in theory. Your children keep their home and they all live together. It's no different than when you and your spouse were married.

Naturally, you have a custody schedule. The children never have to move into your house, though, or into your spouse's house. Instead, you move into the house when it's your turn to spend time with the children, and then you move out -- and your ex moves in -- when it is his or her turn.

Stability for the Kids

This clearly gives children the stability that they want, and that you want for them. They may not even feel like life has changed that much. They do not see you and your ex at the same time as often, but the divorce does not upset their entire lives. They don't face the significant changes that many children of divorce have to deal with.

The Downside: It's Expensive

One downside to this plan is that it can cost a lot. Think about the cumulative costs. You need to own the family home. You also need to own an apartment or a second home to live in when it's not your turn to be with the kids. On top of that, your ex needs to own a second residence for when they aren't in the family home.

This is only realistic for wealthy families. However, what some do to make it possible on a lower budget is just to rent one apartment. If it's your turn with the kids, your ex lives in the apartment. If it's his or her turn in the house, you live in the apartment. You rotate back and forth as needed.

Of course, as you can imagine, this does require a lot of cooperation between you and your ex. You may end up sharing both of your homes -- and the costs -- with one another. For some people, that's just not something they want to deal with after a divorce. However, if giving the children a stable home really is the main thing you want to accomplish, this is one way that you can do it.

Moving Forward

No matter how you decide to move forward with your divorce, make sure you are well aware of all of the parental rights that you have and the options you can utilize to get through the process smoothly.